Had one of those mountain-top prayer experiences today.
I spent some time reading this morning:
Exodus-
15:12
So the people grumbled against Moses, saying, “What are we to drink?”
17:2-3
So they quarreled with Moses and said, “Give us water to drink.”
Moses replied, “Why do you quarrel with me? Why do you put the Lord to the test?”
But the people were thirsty for water there, and they grumbled against Moses. They said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children and livestock die of thirst?”
Genesis 15:6
Abram believed the Lord, and he credited it to him as righteousness.
I have been questioning, grumbling, and doubting heavily on a regular basis. While reading and praying today I am excited to say that a moment of "poor in spirit," and "mourning," (Matt 5:1-2) broke through to my heart. Humbly accepting the way things are progressing and acknowledge my shameful thoughts and lack of faith has really been a blessing. I hope to continue on THIS path.
It has been put on our hearts to make some unprecedented moves in our life. We do not know if a job will be there yet, where we will live, or any details at all; but we have a plan. Prayerfully we will set out and stay with family and friends while "finding" the things we need along the way. Perhaps I should say "be provided." Matthew 6 says to seek his Kingdom and righteousness and the rest will be provided.
If you are reading this, please pray for our plan and the road ahead. We still need to decide on some details, as well as put our trust in God laying some early groundwork for us to make things move ahead.
Tri Cities will see the evidence of God's grace one way or another. We hope to be a part of it and will continue to "Go." In our "Going," we will see God do amazing things where ever that may be...
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Monday, May 21, 2012
Searching
"No."
"No."
"No."
"Call in a couple months..."
Today I did some follow up on jobs in the Tri Cities. These were not quite the answers I was looking for. The most promising lead told me to call back in July (It's May).
It's hard after this to envision setting off to evangelize new lands. I really want to invest my whole heart to the mission ahead. I can't help but question myself. "Is God really calling us?" I probably shouldn't be so surprised that things are not going like I want them too. Couldn't things go perfect just this once.
Isaiah 55: 8-9
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
I would like to say I am OK with what ever happens. Perhaps I am for a few minutes a day. The other 23+ hours I have to pray about my heart. Many times I find that I am doubting, complaining, and faithless. "Increase my faith Lord!"
I'm tired pretty much every day just working, taking care of the family, and living out the mission here and now. Most of the time tomorrow seems impossible to plan for and to serve God with everything I have. I feel like I should have some sort of plan by now for going across the country. We have moved many times in the last 5 years and it is hard to think about it again. Each time has tested us to the breaking point mentally, physically, emotionally, and of course spiritually.
I have prayed some challenging prayers lately and I am struggling to wait patiently, and more importantly; with faith.
Matthew 14:30-31
But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
I think this is the part where I step out and see the wind start blowing.
"No."
"No."
"Call in a couple months..."
Today I did some follow up on jobs in the Tri Cities. These were not quite the answers I was looking for. The most promising lead told me to call back in July (It's May).
It's hard after this to envision setting off to evangelize new lands. I really want to invest my whole heart to the mission ahead. I can't help but question myself. "Is God really calling us?" I probably shouldn't be so surprised that things are not going like I want them too. Couldn't things go perfect just this once.
Isaiah 55: 8-9
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
I would like to say I am OK with what ever happens. Perhaps I am for a few minutes a day. The other 23+ hours I have to pray about my heart. Many times I find that I am doubting, complaining, and faithless. "Increase my faith Lord!"
I'm tired pretty much every day just working, taking care of the family, and living out the mission here and now. Most of the time tomorrow seems impossible to plan for and to serve God with everything I have. I feel like I should have some sort of plan by now for going across the country. We have moved many times in the last 5 years and it is hard to think about it again. Each time has tested us to the breaking point mentally, physically, emotionally, and of course spiritually.
I have prayed some challenging prayers lately and I am struggling to wait patiently, and more importantly; with faith.
Matthew 14:30-31
But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
I think this is the part where I step out and see the wind start blowing.
Monday, May 14, 2012
Beginning
When I came out of waters of D'anza Cove in San Diego I was filled with the anticipation of doing something wild'n'crazy for God. My good Friend Jacques had just returned from a mission to North Africa. Many young disciples were heading off to new cities and new countries to preach the word of God and make disciples. It was an exciting time and I was ready to go, full of zeal. It's been 13 years since that Sunday.
Since then, much has happened and I may elaborate in later posts. I think I have always dreamed of planting a church, but it has seemed more of a desire than a reality. Maybe it is because I am not 20 any more. Taking a family of four on a faith journey like starting a church is a big bite to chew on. Can we really lay down our lives...and raise our kids, find a new job, and take on whatever God has for us?
Right now we wait, pray, waiver, pray some more, and wait again for the next step. I do not have a job in Tri-Cities yet. We are wrestling with being faithful, and yet practical. With no job, there is no move. I dislike putting limits on how faithful I'll be. Sometimes I want to just say I'm going no matter what. It's a tough reality to process through my heart. There are many instances where I know people just "Go". For now I guess my faith lies with the belief that God will provide before it gets to that point.
Genesis 12:1
The Lord had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.
Since then, much has happened and I may elaborate in later posts. I think I have always dreamed of planting a church, but it has seemed more of a desire than a reality. Maybe it is because I am not 20 any more. Taking a family of four on a faith journey like starting a church is a big bite to chew on. Can we really lay down our lives...and raise our kids, find a new job, and take on whatever God has for us?
Right now we wait, pray, waiver, pray some more, and wait again for the next step. I do not have a job in Tri-Cities yet. We are wrestling with being faithful, and yet practical. With no job, there is no move. I dislike putting limits on how faithful I'll be. Sometimes I want to just say I'm going no matter what. It's a tough reality to process through my heart. There are many instances where I know people just "Go". For now I guess my faith lies with the belief that God will provide before it gets to that point.
Genesis 12:1
The Lord had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)